In response to: “Why Chinese Mothers are Superior” by Amy
Chua and “Why I love my Strict Chinese Parents” by Sophia Chua-Rubenfeld
I’ve read
this article at least half a dozen times and I still don’t know how I feel
about the whole subject of Tiger moms/Eagle dads. Everything Chua says makes
perfect sense to me. How western parents are hyper sensitive about their
children’s self esteem, or how Chinese parents just want the best for their
children. From Sophia’s letter it’s obvious that Chua isn’t an evil parent.
Chua clearly cares and loves her daughters. And any “cruel” methods she uses
are used out of love.
But then I
look back at my childhood. I have an Eagle dad (the male counterpart to Tiger
moms). I remember when I was a kid, he would make my brothers and I memorize
parts of the dictionary. He’d give us sections of dictionaries and expect us to
know how to spell and the meanings of each and every word. We had from the time
we got home from school to the time he got home from work to memorize pages and
pages of words. He would then quiz us. If we got any wrong, we had to go back
and study more. We weren’t allowed to stop until he was satisfied. More than
once, I stayed up well into the morning memorizing.
Unlike
Sophia, I don’t appreciate what my father did. I honestly have not benefited
from this. I don’t know the meanings to a lot of words and I still suck at
spelling. Heck, I can’t even look at a dictionary without cringing anymore. Having
him yell at me for being “stupid” totally damaged my self esteem. Quite
frankly, I don’t think my father was doing any of this out of love. I truly
believe he wanted my brothers and I to succeed so he could look good when
compared to his siblings. Now, I don’t think I can honestly say I love my dad.
I don’t think my brothers can either.
Was either of your parents tyrannical dictators that
expected nothing but perfection from you?
If so, do you appreciate what they did or not?
Linda Wei
Section A01
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